The United States saw the lowest birthrate since 1979 in 2023, the year I had my fourth child. I call him my “spite” baby. We already had three, and my husband was pushing for a fourth. I thought I was done — until a doctor at UCLA dramatically suggested I get a hysterectomy due to a cyst she worried was cancerous.
When I pushed back and said I thought removing my uterus was a little extreme, her response was, “Well, I see on your chart here you already have three kids. It’s not like you’d want any more.”
Four months after my cyst removal was cleared and I was given the “cancer-free” go-ahead, we got pregnant with our fourth. I was a “geriatric pregnancy” and totally fine to birth naturally at home; the cost was covered by our Christian health share plan, an option not covered by many mainstream insurance companies. The average out-of-pocket cost for a natural vaginal birth in an American hospital is over $2,000.
Not every family can support four children, or even the replacement rate of 2.1. President Donald Trump wants to change that.
The Trump administration is considering a $5,000 “baby bonus,” offering programs to educate women about their fertility, and offering 30% of Fulbright scholarships to women who are married or already mothers. These are small steps, but they are not enough. They also show how out of touch government employees and economists are with the experiences of women in this country.
The anti-fertility messages start young. Public school sex education does nothing to inform young men and women how fertility works. Educators actively teach, “Don’t get pregnant!” The priority has been on contraceptive use and prevention of HIV/AIDS, not on basic female biology.
The medical community has prescribed birth control to girls as young as 12 to help with cramps or clear acne without addressing the long-term side effects, from depression to a higher risk of breast cancer.
When girls grow up, they enter a world where it’s expensive to hire childcare for a date night, let alone for a job. Companies such as Tesla, Dick’s Sporting Goods, and even the superstore of the heartland Walmart are willing to shell out thousands of dollars for abortions, which is still cheaper than expanding their maternity (and paternity) care policies or providing in-office childcare.
In some states, including Arizona, female lawyers are restricted from taking time off for pro bono work or mothering based on regulations that require extra hoops for their departure from practicing law in a courtroom.
As a mom of multiples, I support the option of school choice, the ability to purchase better insurance across state lines, and the deregulation of industries so that women don’t have to be relicensed in careers such as teaching or hair cutting when they move from state to state, a process that can take months.
On the ideological side, mothers have to face both the part of the conservative movement that thinks women should solely be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen and the Hollywood elites who have perpetuated the image of the mother as a frazzled mess with no emotional balance or ability to take care of herself.
Emily Rose Chadwick, CEO of the Mama Wilder Foundation, a nonprofit organization that offers resources to single moms, told me Trump’s plan isn’t good enough.
“$5,000 won’t convince anyone to have another baby, but addressing the hellish family court system, abysmal maternal mortality rate, astronomical rates of domestic violence in pregnancy and postpartum, and failing public school systems might,” she said. “Maybe take the seed oils and corn syrup out of infant formula and incentivize employers to offer paid leave, and you’ll have women wanting more babies.”
The bottom line is that $5,000 isn’t enough to encourage women to have more children when we, as a society, do not embrace children at all stages and engage women in seeking out partners to help them on their journey to and through motherhood.
BIRTH RATES LANGUISHED NEAR RECORD LOWS IN 2024 AS TRUMP EYES BABY BOOM
We forget to tell men to take ownership of their children’s lives and advise them to have an active role in parenting. Parenting is better with two. When fathers are more involved in the home, mom, dad, and baby do better. A present father is key too. It’s not just about incentivizing women; it’s about ensuring we’re incentivizing families.
We can start with actually educating young girls on how their bodies are different than a boy’s, then providing them with the best education possible and offering equal opportunities in the workplace. We mothers need industries that promote full family values, a government that gets out of the way, and maybe one day a private chain of businesses with an outdoor wine bar and a safely fenced playground attached to have a glass of pinot noir with girlfriends and remember the days when America decided to become more pro-mom.
Elisha Krauss is a conservative commentator and speaker who resides in Los Angeles, California, with her husband and their four children. She is an advocate for women’s rights, school choice, and smaller government.
